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Dear Mr. Ukraine President
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 Nord Stream 2 runs 1224 kilometers from Russia to Germany.   This is the WWII British Hedgehog magnetically-triggered depth charge. |
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 This is Hetman Sahaydachniy, the frigate of the Ukrainian Navy.  This is the path from the Black Sea to the Baltic Sea. Need I elaborate? OK, in case there is a translation problem. Many people think of depth charges as what they see in old movies.  Those depth charges were unreliable and 7% effective. |
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 The British Hedgehog depth charge, developed 1943, was 25% effective. Rather then one big can of explosives, the Hedgehog launched dozens of small ones, relying on one of them actually hitting the submarine. The explosive charge in a Hedgehog would easily rupture the Nord Stream 2 pipeline. Move one or two of your Naval ships, or even a few boats to the Baltic Sea. Have them trace the route of the pipe line, back and forth, back and forth. This is how diplomacy is launched. Find out if Britain is your friend when you ask for the Hedgehog plans. Find out if Germany is your friend if they never use the pipeline. OK, nothing to see here KGB, just move along, OK, we are all done. Bye. Now Volodymyr, make a big production out of the Hedgehog Navy. Watch the movie Wag the Dog for some good tips. It's a pageant. But look at this: 
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| It is the United States AN-Mk 41 aerial depth charge, or depth bomb. You just drop it out of a plane. Now see if we Americans are your friend when you ask for the Mk 41 plans. A little Cessna 172 could probably take one or two of them.  OK, maybe the KGB kept watching our little video. So maybe they know all about aerial depth charges.  Either way, I guarantee you, Vladimir Putin will be a lot nicer in the future.  And so will those Germans.  Everybody says you were a comedian. Nobody will be laughing now. Best wishes; Your pal, Pavel. |
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